. . . but for now, let’s all look at how gorgeous my good friend Missy looks in January’s issue of Shape Magazine!

You might remember when I participated in the photo shoot for this issue. Although I didn’t get to make my national magazine debut as a minor background player this time, I am just so impressed with how great Missy looks and sounds.

Quick life recap:

I’ve been working 12 hour days. Work is literally insane right now.

I found out my health insurance is being raised to $700 a month starting January — which is essentially a big pay cut for me that I can’t afford. I love how my hard work gets rewarded.

I spent $500 on prescriptions this week alone. Despite my expensive health plan.

I owe you all a race recap — although sadly, the vividness of my memories are fading. I had so much to say the day of the race but no time to say it. I’ll do my best and post my perfect playlist.

My writing class is over! More on that soon.

I have a VERY exciting challenge for myself starting in January that I will be documenting on the blog. I can’t say what it is yet, but I will say that it is something kinda official — meaning, I will have to maintain a regular blogging schedule because I won’t only be accountable for myself! It will be very hard. It will be a serious challenge. There will be a giveaway involved at some point during it. I can’t wait.

Any guesses what it is??

In response to by Beam Green post, I got this spam comment:

I think you are wrong and many people will not agree with you…

Ha. Let me know if you are one of the many who don’t agree that I attended Beam Green or that I listened to speakers from different companies or that I am learning how to feel better.

I know it is a bot and spam and all, but it made me laugh. Anyway!

I am back from staycation and it was truly the best staycation of all time. I just had really great days each day. Time to recap.

Monday
I woke up at 7 am (ughhh) partly because the boy said bye to me but I don’t blame him since a minute later my ALARM went off. It is set for “Weekdays Only” and I forgot to change that. Oops. I couldn’t fall back to sleep, so I woke up and made a green juice.
Juicer help needed — A couple weeks ago I decided to juice carrots. I HATED it. But ever since then, all my juices taste like carrots. I have washed the juicer in the dishwasher 4 times since then, and rinsed with it hot water more times than I can count. I still cannot get the carrot taste out of my juices! Any advice? Ughhh.

After my juice I played on the internet a little, checked my work email and then got ready for my Monday morning run. I decided to wear my knee sleeves this time. I used to wear them all the time until my PT told me they won’t make a difference. But after every run, my knees KILL me when I go down any stairs. It is unbearable. So I decided to give the knee sleeves a shot.

Being unable to escape work even on my day off, I sported a visor with my company’s (former?) logo on it.

My run was amazing. I did get my usual upper ribcage cramp early on, which was probably because I had the juice. I was able to run through the pain and it went away. The run felt much quicker than shorter than usual, even though it was the same distance as always. I think I am finally getting better at it and really becoming more of a “runner.” And for the first time, my HR did not reach the 190s! I ran for 36 minutes, burned about 340 calories and my distance was somewhere around 3.3 miles but I don’t know for sure. I wish that I bought the HRM that tracks distance, but back when I bought my Polar F7 (January) I had no idea I would ever be running outside and wanting to know how far I went!

After the amazing run, I came home and had breakfast. Then I lounged around a little, put on a bathing suit and clothes and got on the subway. This girl was on the subway too:

I don’t get which part of this outfit she thought was appropriate.

I went to Penn Station where I was surprised to see a juice bar! It had been a long time since I was there. I got a shot of wheatgrass but it didn’t taste as good as the others I’ve had. And it was more expensive. Then I took the LIRR to Queens where I met my best friend. We picked up wraps at a really cute wrap and juice place and headed out to Jones Beach. They got my wrap request wrong (why does this always happen to me!) so I only ate half of it to avoid getting sick. We laid out on the beach for hours and it felt AMAZING. I felt so peaceful and worry-free laying on the sand with my eyes closed. So much better than being at work!

The birds were bold at the beach. Look at this one standing on someone’s purse:

At 5:45 we finally left the beach and Rae drove me back to the LIRR. I has just missed one train and had some time before the next one, so I stopped at Maggie Moo’s for some ice cream. I had been  craving ice cream all day and I only ate half my wrap, so I was hungry.

I got their Better Batter flavor which was fantastic! I’d walked past Maggie Moo’s before but never went in, so I didn’t realize it was similar to Cold Stone. I got chunks of brownie mixed in. It was perfection.

I was so happy for the rest of the day! It was the most relaxing, peaceful day I have had in a very long time.

Tuesday
I woke up at 7 again because the boy forgot to close the door and I heard him puttering about the living room. Once again, I couldn’t fall back to sleep, so I grudgingly got up and made green juice. I was hungry right after, so I did what no juice drinker is supposed to do — I ate a meal right after. You’re supposed to wait awhile so your body can absorb the nutrients, but I was hungry and it was my vacation and I wanted to eat so I ate! I had cereal and it was yummy. I love cereal. I got into another bathingsuit and took my lounge chair downstairs to the water. There wasn’t much sun at this time, it was around 9:30, but I  found a spot with the sun shining on a point that jutted out into the Hudson.

I set up camp there and enjoyed the sun. I finished my book — Snow Flower and the Secret Fan – which I recommend. It was a beautiful read and I am still thinking about it. Before I finished, though, sprinklers turned on and I got wet! I moved my chair to be away from the sprinklers so I could finish my book and leave. When I finished, it was close to 12:30 and as I was walking away, different sprinklers were going on and I had to walk right through them. It felt amazing.

I made lunch – a quesadilla with scrambled eggs, raw cheddar and red peppers. I topped the quesadilla with guacamole, making it a very Mexican lunch. I have been obsessed with making quesadillas because my favorite bread product of all time is Rudi’s Organic Bakery Spelt Tortillas. They are perfect for me because they contain just 1g of fiber, are made from spelt which is so much more nutritious than anything white (the other low fiber bread choice) and are extremely versatile. I use them to make almond butter and banana wraps for lunch at work, quesadillas and pizza! More on that later.

I was so tired after lunch that I couldn’t imagine working out, which was what I had planned on my agenda for the day. I got into bed — sunblock still on because I figured I’d be outside to work out soon — and promptly fell asleep. Gross! When I woke up it was after 3. I really needed that nap after waking up at 7 for two days in a row. As if I don’t wake up at 7 five days in a row normally, and I don’t get naps then!

After my nap I was groggy but ready to go outside and rollerblade! I was so tempted to run again, but my knees were in such great condition after Monday’s run that I didn’t want to injure myself by upping my frequency to two days in a row. I did want to work out outside. It was a gorgeous day, I love being outside, I don’t have access to the boy’s gym when he has his keys with him and I didn’t want to go to Core Fusion on such a gorgeous day. I only used my rollerblades once this entire summer, so I figured it was the perfect time to try them again! And after examining them, I saw that they did in fact have a brake. I forgot ALL about that when I experienced my terrifying incident in Central Park with Missy. If only I knew!

Since it was so hot and so sunny out, I made a bold move. I decided to rollerblade wearing only shorts and a bikini top. This is MAJOR decision for me. This time last summer I wouldn’t even wear a bikini to the beach, I was so self conscious about my belly. This decision shows how far I’ve come. And I was hoping to get some more Dori color. (Dori color is not the same as regular color. When I have Dori color, I am still drastically paler than anyone who hasn’t even been out in the sun at all).

So I did it! Just like someone in LA on a boardwalk, right! I wore a shirt on my way out, then I sat down to put on my rollerblades and protective gear, took off my shirt and was on my way. I am a terrified rollerblader and I wear a helmet, wrist guards and knee pads. I always feel silly skating by other rollerbladers wearing none of these items. They always seem so confident and free and I wish I could just skate without worrying about every tiny dip.

And I just want to say, I did not feel self conscious at all!

I rollerbladed for an entire hour. I really wanted to skate up to this part of Riverside Park where I go on my runs but I was (for the second time) unable to get there. So here’s the deal. If I skate one way, it is all nice and smooth. Bicycles are not allowed to go there. If I skate in the other direction I am with the bikes. Every few feet there are 4 strips of cobblestone intended to slow the bikes down. It is difficult for me to skate over these. It is not difficult for anyone else to skate over these as I saw people effortlessly glide right through. But for me, it requires extra attention and propelling of my feet to avoid getting stuck in them.

Eventually, there is a very slight hill that I might have chosen to tackle except for the 4 strips of cobblestone directly at the bottom. I could just see myself going too fast, not able to slow down on the little hill and bang right into the cobblestone and topple over. Maybe it wouldn’t happen but I was too scared to risk it. Although I think I might next time.

Although I might walk my rollerblades up there. I will definitely have to walk them back down because there is a loooong downhill on the way back and there is no way I will ever attempt that! I saw a guy gliding easily down a hill, riding his brake. Every time I tested my brake, it didn’t seem to work that well. At least I have one! I feel much more comforted knowing I have a brake. I still can’t believe I had no idea.

After my glorious skate (my right foot used to always hurt in my rollerblade but it didn’t this time!) I went back home to shower and get ready for a dinner I was really looking forward to. In the summer of 2005, I worked on a teen tour. I was responsible (along with a few other people, although at times just one other — hi Marc!) up to 60 kids at a time. One of the kids and I became really close and still talk! She is the sweetest, most down to earth, most fun, brightest girl. I love her! So I was very excited to have  dinner with her since I hadn’t seen her in at least a year. Way too long! What shocks me most is that she was going into her second year of high school when she was my camper. Now she is going into her second year of COLLEGE. I can’t get over it. And she has a BlackBerry! All the kids do these days . . .

We went to my favorite restaurant that uses healthy ingredients Citrus – and it was fantastic. After eating we walked over to Amber where the boy was having pad thai with a friend and she got to meet him! I love it. Another relaxing, perfect, fun day.

Wednesday
I woke up once again at 7 am because the boy was talking, with the feeling of dread I normally feel on a Sunday — but to a MUCH lesser extent. I made a green juice. Thunderstorms were in the forecast and I had to decide what to do with my day. I really wanted to be outside again. I had Core Fusion during the day on my original list of things I wanted to do during my time off, but I thought about it and realized I could go to CF at any time, after work. I can’t run after work. I can only run on an empty stomach, ie, first thing in the morning. It wasn’t raining and I really wanted to run again, that is just what I did! My knee felt totally fine from Monday’s run and while running outside twice in a week is something I have never done before and I was worried about injuring myself, I decided to just do it. I wanted to. I felt great. I had this free time.

So I ran!

Another really great run! I even came across some kind of doggie meet-up, as many owners and their pups were all gathered in a section of Riverside Park. Very interesting. Although towards the end I got a ribcage cramp in a new place — higher up and on the other side. Blah. It went away. I finished this run in 36 minutes (same exact route as the last one) and burned 340 calories. My HR did get to 191 but that is still much better than 199, especially since it was hot and humid and I came back sweatier than ever.

After my shower I made breakfast and sat down to watch The View, just as I had planned. Speaking of The View, our building gym made it onto the show the next day! I recorded it since I knew it was coming because the boy was working out when they filmed there. How cool!

My toes were in desperate need of a pedicure. I had to go back to the east side for a doctor’s appointment and I figured it was a good time to pick up my mail as well. I walked all the way home (about a 45 min walk) and got a pedicure and a clear manicure at a brand new place that opened around the corner. It was very strange being back in my neighborhood because SO many stores and restaurants were gone! Very sad . . . this nail place actually took the spot of a restaurant that had first shrunk in size and then closed altogether. But it was 20% off because they are in their first month. The pedicure chair was the most comfortable I have ever been in, with a squishy pillow and all, and the price was really great. I had some time to kill before the doctor so I went to the health food store. I was making my purchases (one which included carob clusters with peanuts — just like a Mr Goodbar but better!) and at the last second a healthy raw chocolate bar caught my eye. I grabbed it and bought it and realized later when I looked at the label that it has 14 grams of fiber. Um. One bite of that and I would probably drop dead. Fiber is usually the first thing I look at when buying food but in this case I was more into the ingredient list, which is my newest priority.

Anyway, I don’t have any wishes to be rushed to the emergency room because I ate a bar. So I’ll give it to someone.

I still had some time so I stopped in to this great jewelery store that my mom recently discovered as well and loved. Even though I didn’t have much time to spend there, I was in love with everything and ended up walking out with 3 purchases! My favorite is this ring:

I have the skinniest fingers and have an impossible time finding cool rings that fit me, so I was thrilled to find the perfect ring that was adjustable! I had to get it.

Finally it was time for the doctor. I had to get tested for something that House would say I don’t have — and he is likely right. But, we had to officially rule it out.

 I wanted to walk back to the boy’s after that but I was scared that it would start to rain. I have this intense aversion to rain that makes practically no sense. I was walking around all day with my giant umbrella and everyone who asked me about it seemed surprise that rain was in the forecast! Earlier, I had considered signing up for an evening CF class with my favorite teacher, but I couldn’t commit to it because I didn’t know what the rain would be like. I don’t like having to decide so far ahead of time if I have to attend a class in the evening. Maybe on a day without rain in the forecast! And it was better to rest my knees anyway.

I decided to be safe and cab it back. It never did rain. But I think I made a good decision for my knee and hip. My hip was tight from my run and then my 45 minute walk, and I didn’t want to overdo it with my knee either when it was behaving so perfectly.

 And that night for dinner, I used my spelt wrap to make a pizza with this delicious, sweet organic tomato sauce I got (and I generally don’t like tomato sauce), fresh mozzarella and red peppers. Perfect end to my staycation.

Let’s look back on my original staycation list and see if I accomplished what I planned:

Relax – check
Read a novel (not a food/nutrition book) – check
Sleep – didn’t do so well with this one
Lay out in the sun on water by apartment – check
Take a Core Fusion class during the daytime hours – no
Rest – check
Watch The View – check
Nap – check
Go to pool/beach with best friend – check
Check work email (message overflow upon return is stressful!) – check, every day
Go for a run outdoors – double check, triple if you count my rollerblading

Not bad at all! I completed all but two of my goals for these 3 days and I ran outside more than I planned and even rollerbladed, which was not in my original plan. I am content with what I accomplished.

On Thursday, I came back to work. And I was brutally reminded of the absolute best part of not being at work:  not hearing Simba. Not even THINKING about him once or remembering his existence. WHY IS HE SHOUTING SO LOUDLY. Does he really not understand that just because someone is on the other end of a phone line, they can still hear you when you speak at a normal volume? You don’t actually have to yell for them to hear you. Or shriek. Or howl. Or say HMPH.

Also, when you sit in a cubicle, you DON’T use speakerphone. Especially on personal calls! WTF. You also don’t leave your conference call on speakerphone and walk away from your desk.

He hasn’t gotten off the phone once since I’ve been back.

Currently reading: The Next Thing on my List. I actually didn’t want to buy this book originally. I was at a buy 2 get 1 free table at Barnes & Noble and really wanted Snow Flower and the Secret Fan and People are Unappealing, so I needed a  third book since it would be free. There wasn’t much else on the table that appealed to me. I had seen The Next Thing on my List before and while it sounded like it could be cute it also sounded . . . I don’t know the word. Shamltzy? I don’t know. I thought it could be maybe cute but it could also not.

Now I am reading it and I am SO glad I got it. I am really enjoying this book! It isn’t like what I had worried it would be like . . . it is just very good, very funny, very cute and a great easy, summer read. I am excited to finish! And I heard it is being turned into a movie, which I can definitely see happening.

Yesterday I was at Barnes & Noble again and I picked up a random book and glanced at the back cover only to see the name Dori on it! That is the name of a character in the book. Not knowing anything more about this book other than that it is in the New Fiction section and has a character named Dori, I bought it. I had to! Right?

It’s called More Than It Hurts You and upon reading the back cover when I got home, it actually looks  good! I am excited to read that next and see my name throughout an entire book. Wonder where the author got the name from!

Oh! And I got Regina Spektor tickets for October at Radio City! I didn’t realize she was at the Beacon in June, so I am VERY excited to see her live for the first time. Any other Regina fans out there? And now it is the weekend again! I’m excited for brunch and kayaking with my closest girlfriends on Sunday — one who just got back from birthright and I can’t wait to hear all about it. And I owe you another frustrating doctor story next week.

I leave you with my sister and good friend, Nicole and Doggie. Since my mom is moving, I had to go there last weekend and will be going again tomorrow to clear out my stuff. I kept Nicole with me through college and on, but Doggie stayed at home. Now they are finally reunited:

Sorry for my long absence from the blag! Sometimes life gets in the way. My heart feels warm and mushy because of all of you who have been asking where I’ve been! I still can’t believe people care about anything I have to say. But this will motivate me to actually write a book one day…

It’s been a very busy week, but luckily this week will be a short one because we are closed on Good Friday! My office is hardly ever closed because we follow the stock market schedule. So, when they’re open, we’re open. Last year Good Friday fell on my birthday, so I was especially happy. I was one happy Jew.

I have lots to tell you all!

Book Review TK
I finished Rethinking Thin. I want to do an official review, but in my rush to get to work this morning I stared directly at the book and didn’t think to actually take it with me. A total brain fart! Does that ever happen to you?

I want to wait and review it when I have it in front of me for reference. I will say this — it was fascinating. I have a much clearer understanding of weight and why we are the way we are. I will get into this more later this week in my review. Stay tuned!

POM Review
I received my POM juices from POM Wonderful! I tried one and it was a bit more tart than I like things — but mixed with some Diet Sprite and Vodka, it would be the perfect refreshing drink! Vodka optional, of course. I will be saving the rest of my free bottles for warm spring/summer days when I can take it outside, sit with a book, and drink in healthiness mixed with not-so-healthiness of Sprite. Some of you would probably enjoy it along, but it is not for me in its true form. My favorite thing about it? The only ingredient is pomegranate juice! I love, love, LOVE  that. “No added sugars, preservatives, colors or cheap filler juices.”  Read about the health benefits here. Do you think I could bring it with me to a bar and asked it to be mixed with my drink? 

Hehe, Juice Couture.

Brownie Bites
What else? Well, the Erin Baker’s Organic Brownie Bites that Missy got me for my birthday are almost all gone already! My favorite thing to do it crumble one up and mix it into my Vanilla Chobani/Bauman’s Pumpkin Butter combination. Truly the perfect breakfast. And the boy loves them too! I often see empty wrappers laying around his room.  I was sad that we flew through them so fast, since the shipping price on their website adds up — the three boxes I ordered came to $24 with shipping! But yesterday I made a discovery — THEY SELL THEM AT MY HEALTH FOOD STORE! Aaahhh! They only had the Walnut flavor which is fine by me! I bought 3 boxes and am now very happy. These little brownies are so chocolatey and great, truly the perfect snack and all 90 or 100 calories. I love brownies.

Missing My Best Friend’s Birthday  … 2 years in a row
While it seems from this blog that I have been all brownies and smiles lately, that is sadly not the case. My GI problems are getting in the way of my life. My best friend’s birthday was on Saturday, and she planned to go out to a bar in the East Village. During the day we enjoyed a spa day to celebrate (I got a Hot Stone massage) and after relaxing all day were ready to have some fun at night. It’s been a long time since I dressed up to go to a bar and I was excited! I packed a few outfits to bring to the boy’s, along with some jewelery choices and really great gold Arturo Chiang shoes that I have been looking for an excuse to wear.

I got to the boy’s and was relaxing before it was time to shower when the pains began. I usually get my stomach pains in the same place — high up in my stomach, right under my chest. They are usually very intense, and come and go every few minutes. This means they are spasms. Sometimes the pain is worse than others. On Saturday, they were intense. Very intense. I was crying every time I felt one come on. I couldn’t move, but I didn’t want to miss Rae’s birthday. I was hoping they would die down so I could start getting ready, since it was getting late and I needed to get in to the shower. I tried to get up, but found myself curled on another spot of the bed. I couldn’t even sit up. I got myself onto my back and it felt wrong. I felt like the pain might feel better if I was on my stomach. I tried to turn over but couldn’t move; the pain became worse when I moved. Finally, I got myself onto my stomach but it felt even worse than on my back. I tried to go onto my side and failed. I tried again a couple minutes later and was able to curl on my left side. That seemed to help, and the pain became a little less intense. I was putting off calling Rae because I really wanted to make it — I missed her birthday last year because of my stomach and didn’t want that to happen yet again.

The pain subsided a little but so I went into the shower. I’m not gonna lie — it was hard. Standing there was hard, I felt weak and the pain was coming in waves. During the shower I knew there was no way I could spend time at a bar, possibly standing, and talking to people. I couldn’t even imagine a cab ride feeling this way.  I knew what I had to do.

I got out of the shower, back into bed and told Rae I could not make it. I felt like the worst friend in the world.

I asked the boy, who is a doctor, if it is possible this is all fake. Maybe none of this is really happening. Maybe nothing is actually wrong with me and the pains aren’t there. 

He said that as a physician, he knew with 100% certainty that my problems are real. I had multiple tests that all confirmed the problems, that all pointed to the same condition. It is not normal to experience the things I experience, he said.

Maybe it’s not normal for other people, but maybe it is normal for me — this condition is MY normal. Therefore, nothing is wrong, I told him. For me, this is normal.

He said if I was born this way, then yes, it would be my normal. But I wasn’t born this way. I have an exact incident I could point to that caused all of this to happen. I can pinpoint that incident, that infection, as the time everything changed for me. It is not fake. It is real.

And I know that. I know this is real but I can’t help but question it when things go badly at inopportune times — ie, my best friend’s birthday TWO YEARS IN A ROW.

I even went so far as to point out that I was conveniently fine on my own birthday. Yet on hers, I was in excrutiating pain. He said, when you have these pains at other times, is it on days you have something special planned? No, I said. Usually it happens at work on a normal day. There you go, the boy said. It is just unfortunate chance that it happened today. It happens at times, and today was one of those times.

I know this. But I can’t stop feeling like the Worst Person In The Wooooooooorld.

The real Worst Person in The World is Simba. I can’t take it. He is out of control and has been SO much worse lately. The HMPHs don’t stop. The hyena laughter and the cackling “kekekeke” laughter. The shouting out words and phrases in a high pitched voice. The reptition of the same sounds over and over. The huge pre-laugh WHOOP that he makes before every burst of laughter. Can’t. Take. It.

4 Way Class Comparison TK
As I’ve mentioned, Melissa at FitnessNYC gave everyone at the blogger events 2 free passes to Physique 57.  She loves it there (as does Kelly Ripa) and constantly raves about it. She also belongs to Exhale for the Core Fusion classes. I ordered the DVDs (haven’t tried them yet) and they came with a free class! In addition, my gym offers Transfigure, taught by a Core Fusion instructor and incorporates the same “Lotte Berk” ideas. I have taken Transfigure 3 times so far and am fully addicted. It really is the most comprehensive workout and I am always ready to collapse and scream in pain. Instead, I only sometimes collapse and instead of screaming in pain I let out a big sigh of pain at the end of a set.

So, as I am addicted to Transfigure (after just 3 classes), I am REALLY excited for my two upcoming Physique 57 sessions – 4/12 and 4/23, and my Core Fusion class on 4/25!  I also want to take advantage of the free class The Body offers — this class is the same idea as well. Once I have all four variations under my belt — Physique 57, The Body, Exhale Core Fusion and Transfigure I want to do a four way compare and contrast on here as a resource to anyone thinking of trying them out! I will schedule The Body as soon as I can  fit it in so I can write that exciting blog post!

By the way, if anyone told me a year ago that I would be addicted to spinning and strength classes, I would have laughed in their face. If anyone told me this five years ago, I would have spit in their face.

BAKE SALE
Please visit Meghann’s Bake Sale. All funds raised from this event will go directly to her Team in Training Efforts to support the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. And I am particularly excited because my brother’s girlfriend/practically my sister Mallories is making Mix-and-Match Nut Butter Cups! For my birthday last year, she made me these AMAZING cookie crusted Peanut Butter Cups. Best thing of my life. No joke! This uear she made me delicious Carob Almond Butter Cups which I loved as well! So go bid!

I bid on a couple items myself!

Running Outside Attempt #1
I tried running outside for the first time yesterday in Central Park. The run also had a purpose — get to my apartment on the East side from the boy’s on the West side. I immediately got an intense pain on the outside of my upper thigh. I had to stop. And today my shins are both killing me. Next time, I will try stretching first. I want to be able to run!

Although, the day before I did an OK GO Coached Run on the treadmill and they tell you to go very fast, so maybe I was just recovering from that. I hope! There is nothing more I want than to be able to run outside on beautiful spring and summer days. I did get to walk both to and from the boy’s yesterday so that was a very nice outdoors workout regardless!

My gym has this Alter G treadmill that is supposed to make you weightless and it is very easy on the joints. Maybe I should try it one day! It’s like running in a bubble.

Contest 
Visit What Do I Eat Now for a chance to win a great contest! It includes POM Green Iced Tea which I would LOVE to try as well as a bunch of different cookies, and me love cookies.

I have lots more to write about this week, so please check back. I will try not to fall off the face of the earth again!